Sunday, February 28, 2010

Move Over Bacon,
Here Comes Something Leaner...

Hi, it's me again, Shaboom...

Everyday, FS receives my caloric intake and output via email. Sometimes I send it to her meal by meal as the day progresses. Sometimes, I send the entire day to her right before I go to bed at night. I find the former method more efficient as with the latter I tend to forget a croissant here, a bottle of wine there…

We then go back and forth over email sometimes totaling 100 messages a day. I send photos. She asks questions. We laugh. This is how we amuse ourselves, you know, in between her telling her son to keep his hand out of his pants, me telling Obsessed! to keep his hand out of his pants, her wiping her son's nose, me wiping Obsessed!'s nose, her wiping her son's ass, me wiping... um... my own ass, thank you very much.

We have a lot of similarities and it seems like we both have children, but really, she's the only one of us that is a mother, God bless her heart.

After today, she will be posting a summary of what I eat and any methods I have to burn it off. She thinks she's going to get down to the bottom of this weight loss, use the method herself to get French Skinny, and then we'll sell the formula and make millions! *insert evil laugh here.

She will write in grey and I will write in this lovely burgundy color because, um... it's the color of wine, natch.

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