Shaboom sends us her update from Paris some other foreign place:
Cashew moved from Paris back to the USA 2-3 months ago. He made the decision and just assumed that duh! of course I'd follow him there. It was never a question, "Hey baby, I've been in Europe more than a decade, miss my family, and wanna move back to the US. What do you feel about that? Will you please marry me and come too?"
No, no. It was a decision he made all on his own without consulting me and now he's hurt, sad and miserable without me AND IT'S MY FAULT of course ...because I didn't go with him. You know, because I don't love him enough. And how dare I not follow with no questions asked. And this is what he really wants otherwise he'll never be happy and he'll end up resenting me. So I should just come.
Since he's been gone, I break up with him on practically a bi-weekly basis telling him that this is never going to work and that I'm not moving to America. I'm not really sure why I can't get it to stick. Either a.) I really suck at breaking up with people, b.) I'm not very good at the English language and don't make myself understood, c.) he must really, really love the crap out of me, or d.) he has to win me back because if anyone, he has to be the one doing the breaking up.
I have to either move to the States to be with him or I have to enter the witness protection program or something to finally be rid of him once and for all. Otherwise I'm going to give myself an ulcer.