Wednesday, August 11, 2010

Day 73 from France:

Shaboom sends us her update from Paris SoCal...

I don't have much to report at the moment in LA, so here's what happened previously (forgive my ranting and redundancy...)

I woke up this morning with a headache from last night. Damn you, tequila!

While at the shopping center waiting for my Apple Store appointment yesterday, ManEater and I split a Fudruckers' meal.

I ate a snack after dealing with AAA jumping my dead car battery, buying a new battery and getting my car out of storage.

Before going to a business meeting, ManEater fed me some hors oeuvres. It was very French...

When I left the business meeting, I walked out feeling good because I now have a job for the next month in LA and I will be making money!!! But when I got to my car parked on the hill behind Yamashiro in Hollywood, it had been vandalized. They tore holes in my convertible top, broke off my windshield wipers & antenna, wrote profanity on the paint job and left me a very nasty note that started with "Dear Dickhead" and ended with lots of threats.

My life is never boring!

My last 2 days:

After the mugging, I woke up after 2 hours of sleep with Obsessed! sweating all over me. I really should've stayed up packing but he's sad that I'll be gone for a month, so he wanted to cuddle and spoon and whatnot. For once, I decided to at least somewhat resemble a nice person and I let him have his loving last hours. He keeps threatening me, "It is in your best interest to return. If you don't come back, I will come over there, find you, make a huge scene, and bring you back PERSONALLY."

Good news, Obsessed! quit smoking the wacky tobacky last week and now he's miraculously stopped snoring. SHUT UP I KNOW!! I could sing saccharine sweet musical theater numbers, I'm so freaking happy.

I was finally able to use the home phone, although the internet was still down. I started calling around LA frantically trying to find someone to come get me at the airport. I drank 2 café au lait.

I showered and packed in a frenzy and ran out the door. I took a bus to the train station where I needed to buy tickets but there was only one counter open and a line a mile long. I watched the train leave the platform. Crap. Ten minutes until the next train. I'M GOING TO BE LATE!!! And although I love learning this French custom of "show up late and don't apologize," I'm pretty sure it doesn't fly at the airport.

After 5 minutes, I ran over to the self-serve ticket machines. They don't take paper money. Just coins. Merde! I looked in my change compartment, YES! I had enough. I tapped away at the screen and then started putting my coins in until I realized that for the €4.40 fee, I only had €4.28.Double merde!! I couldn't use credit cards because the machine doesn't take cards with the magnetic strips that you swipe, just cards with a chip. Why can't life just ever be easy?!?!

I got back in line, at the end of the line mind you. I stood there for 3 minutes until the guy that was originally behind me in line had bought his ticket. I ran up to the next guy due to approach the counter with cash in my outstretched hand and an teary excuse of why/how he needed to buy me a ticket, going to miss my flight, etc.

Next thing I know, I was running across the train station, through turnstiles, up and down stairs dragging a heaving suitcase and an almost equally heavy handbag. I made it onto the train just as the doors closed and I was off to the airport. Finally.

When I arrived at the United Airlines ticket counter, it was exactly one hour before my flight was set to depart. The airline representatives receiving me were like, "You're checking a bag? Non non non non non. You are late. Your bag cannot go on the plane." I was almost in tears. The one male United staffer on hand had the kind inclination to ask me why I was late. I explained that I had been mugged a few hours previously and had spent an eternity at le commissariat and whipped out my official police reports to prove it. He waved me through and put me at the front of the line and got me and my bag checked in. THANK YOU there is a God.

20 some odd hours later I arrived in Los Angeles where BootyDance picked me up at the airport and drove me to my friend ManEater's place in Venice Beach where we spent the night chatting over a bottle of wine.

Plane #1 -
Coca Cola (1)
lots of water
Apple Juice (1)
3 small mannicoti
1 small salad with vinaigrette
4 bites chocolate cake
1 roll with a slice of ham and mustard
2 bites Toblerone
1 shortbread cookie

Chicago airport -
venti skinny triple vanilla latte

Plane #2 -
Coca Cola (1)
lots of water
CranApple Juice (1)

I ate an apple and some almonds for dinner.

Lots of escalators, bag dragging, heavy purse lifting, walking, swearing and stressing.


  1. I hate flying. It is the getting through all the security, dragging luggage, etc...that wears me out.

  2. i don't mind flying. but security is annoying, that is for sure. and i pack very lightly because i cannot tolerate the luggage dragging ...or i travel with a man who will do the luggage dragging for me, in which case i pack anvils and bowling balls just to see what he's really made of!