Saturday, June 26, 2010

Day 53 from Burbank: I Have To Change My Whole Life.

My friend's garden.

I have to change my whole life.
This is how jet lag hits me.
I've had it enough times to know that when I get all bummed out after a long trip and start thinking I have to change my whole life, I'm in jet lag land.
You know what helps this? Chips and salsa.
The first bag's free. My dealer, the stewardess on the airplane 2 days ago, gave me a bag of chips. I was feeling good and the bag said "all natural, not fried, blah, blah, blah". I ate the bag. Then asked for another. Then bought 2 bags at the store yesterday. I ate one last night and I already know I will eat the other one tonight. If this keeps up I will be mainlining Nacho Cheese Doritos dipped in sour cream and pace picante hot sauce by tomorrow night.
And so my shame spiral begins.
This is not the French Skinny way.
Crepe fail.
But with bacon, goat cheese, tomatoes and onions it's still delicious.

I finished my kids mac and cheese, then ate more chips and salsa. Then ate chocolate.

For dinner I made Eva's Soup. So delicious. More chocolate for dessert.
Before I went to bed I ate the whole bag of chips.
No stairs. No walking.
I'm feeling uncomfortable in every aspect of my life today.

Let's just say I'm not proud of any of this.
Not my attitude.
Not my self centered behavior.
Not my blaming the stewardess.

I guess there are going to be good days and bad days.
Today I feel lost. And then I remember how lucky I am.
My family.
My friends.
My health.
My home.
The list goes on and on.
This is where I get embarrassed for all my pity party craziness. I am the luckiest person I know. And I'm grateful for all of it.
Except for that biatch who gave me a bag of chips on the plane.
I'm kidding. No seriously, I'm totally almost kidding.

Putain Chips!


  1. Don't beat yourself up--it happens to everyone once in a while.

    But now you know why I loathe the Girl Scout cookie pusher who made me gain 10 lbs. this winter. The little pig-tailed jackass.

  2. I'll just mention once again that I ate half a strawberry pie on Tuesday. Is there room in your spiral? Scoot over.

  3. Alright scoot over more. I put big girl underpants on today with baggy pants.

  4. Keep scooting...I have yet to walk up more than 3 flights of stairs, ate pizza two nights in a row and my fat pants are getting tight. I would kill to have your dedication and persistance. You are my inspiration...and quite frankly, you hitting the chips and salsa a bit has made me feel like I CAN get on the track to french skinny...that I don't have to end it all. But I promise to loathe the BIATCH stewardess that gave you those chips!!

  5. It's fine. You'll be fine. French Skinny is about you enjoying your life. You eat because it's good. You don't overdo it. But enjoy each and every bite. If halfway through that bag of non-organic chips you realize that you're not really enjoying them anymore, then put the bag away. Think about why you're really eating that stuff.

    And then send me that stewardess's number. I want to give her a piece of my mind.

  6. didn't have a chance to read yesterday, but you are the first person EVER to put words to that same feeling i get when i travel. i thought i was the only one who goes down that road...i call it re-entry. hang in there it will certainly pass, as you already know! it is done and over with and like scarlett o'hara said "after all tommorrow is another day." g

  7. You are all my favorite people. I was so embarrassed to write about this day. When I posted it I felt physically ill. Thank you for being so wonderful. And it helps to know you guys can all relate.
    Really, I love you.